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Friday Update: 06/27/08

So I figured it was time to put another post out there…and bump the sad Steve picture down the page. I’m sorry for the gloomy post, but it truly does help me get my feelings out there. I think sometimes I need to express that inmost stuff to really swallow it and move on. I know lots of people who don’t…who prefer not to, actually, and do just fine. But for me, this helps me deal. Maybe I need a little ‘READ WITH CAUTION’ warning on any posts that may be a little much for the average reader.

Things are feeling a bit more normal in this Karwoski house. We both have our moments…but each day I do feel a bit better. I freely admit that the loss of our kitty was a much bigger deal than I really could have prepared myself for. But, I know that in time, we’ll adjust.

Wednesday night I just felt the urge to get out of the house…and maybe away from the reminders that a certain something was missing. So after dinner I suggested we head over to the massive antique store in DM, the Brass Armadillo. I hadn’t been there in a long time and had a number of things I was interested in looking for…not that I need an excuse to peruse antiques! Matt grudgingly agreed to go and we headed over there. Well, it didn’t take long (I believe we were still in the first booth) for Matt to remember that HE likes to look at antiques almost as much as I do! We wandered around the store looking at all the treasures, junk and interesting finds and talked about what we liked and laughed at what we couldn’t understand…it was great! While we were there a huge storm blew through and we wondered more than once if we were going to have to head for a storm shelter. As we finally made our way down the last aisle I asked Matt what time it was…thinking maybe we’d been there an hour or so…turns out we were there for nearly TWO and ½ hours!!!! We closed the place down at just a few minutes before nine! It was so great to just get caught up in the time together and let the worries of everything, even the weather take a back seat. Unfortunately, by the time we were ready to leave it was still storming like crazy. I rolled up my jeans and made a mad dash for the car. Thankfully I could pull the car up close to the awning and Matt didn’t have to get too wet…just one part of his shorts where the water was pouring off the awning right onto him! We got in the car and laughed about how wet we got…and how much fun it was to run in the rain.

Yesterday we met with Dr. Struck, Matt’s neurologist and discussed his China time and what has changed since we last saw her. She thought his tremor looked about the same, but Matt was ramped up talking to her so it was going a little more than usual. He did mention he could calm it down faster and felt that it was a little better than it was on the medication, so we have no plans to go back on. She thought he looked good though, and was glad to hear we were thinking of starting up therapy again. Later in the afternoon we headed out for Matt’s PT evaluation with Amy. It was fun to go back there and see all the familiar faces we haven’t seen in so long. Matt was welcomed back with lots of smiles and well wishes. There’s just something neat about the fact that these people have seen Matt progress so much in the past few years and really see the joy in their eyes when they see how far he’s come. We had fun catching up a bit with Amy as she tested Matt’s strength and coordination…which she did think was improved. She also thought Matt’s speech seemed quicker…and he responded to questions quicker. I mentioned to Matt the other day that I think he’s eating faster too. I always used to be done way before him, but now we sometimes get done at the same time or closer anyway. Just another observation. We talked about how often he’d like to come for therapy and think we may try 3 times a week for a month, and then re-evaluate. I think our goal for therapy will be to work on things with Amy and also to get a good list of things to work on at home so that he doesn’t have to depend on devoted ‘therapy’ time to keep working on things. Hopefully we can get that set up in the next week or do, after we hear back from insurance.

So, it’s been a week with some good things, and some pretty low spots…but I’m happy it’s Friday and we’ve got the weekend ahead of us to be together. We’re planning on going to a movie and maybe working out in the garage a bit. Either way, we’re just happy to be together. I do want to thank you guys for the many kind words and thoughts this week as we mourned the loss of Steve. It helps to know others who have been through similar things, or have pets and can empathize with how much it would hurt to have to make that decision. I believe that pets can bring a whole lotta love to your life, and you shouldn’t shy away from them just because in the end you’ll have to deal with…well, the end. I know it’s hard, sooo much harder than I really thought it would be. But I wouldn’t have changed anything. Steve was the perfect fit for us…from those first days as dimwit newlyweds right up until now…and I’m happy that for 10 years I could brag about having the world’s greatest cat! (Though I’m sure I’ll still brag about how we had the world’s greatest cat…and the title will live on!)

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