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Showing posts from September, 2009

Thursday Update: 09/17/09

Well September 14th came and went without much fanfare. We both had a few moments of ‘oh yeah, it’s the 14th’…but that’s about it. Pretty much the same as last year. I think as the years move on and we get farther and farther away from 2005, the date holds less meaning to us. I also think it’s easier now that we live in our new house…not driving by the old landmarks and living in the old house, it’s easier to not be reminded so much. This past week we did take a drive by our old house, which we do from time to time when we’re in the neighborhood. Matt commented that sometimes he really misses living there…and I do too. It’s hard to put a finger on it, but I think it has less to do with how it was living there after Matt’s hemorrhage and more to do with the memories of our life before. We never knew how good we had it. Sure, we enjoyed our life and tried to live as filled with gratitude as possible…but I think I will always see it a little differently through my new eyes. We had a lot …

Thursday Update: 09/10/09

So we had a Minnesota vacation. It has been four years…almost to the day that all of us Karwoski’s drove up to the lake for vacation. The thought crossed my mind that it was very near to the anniversary of Matt’s hemorrhage. That the last time I looked out over that water it was with Matt standing happily by my side. I wondered if the rush of memories would overwhelm me and stifle my usual giddy vacation mind-set. But, we went, we spent the long Labor Day weekend up there, and not once did I feel the pangs of sadness or loss that I thought I might. Matt said he definitely missed certain things; going over to the lodge for ice cream, fishing alone with his Dad, driving the boat, going down to the harbor at night. But none of these things affected his mood during the trip. I think they were more just small sighs...just a few more reminders that things are different…but acceptance quickly follows.
We were talking about it just now after supper…about how this year as we approach Septemb…