Skip to main content

Tuesday Update: 07/11/06

Well, another week has come and gone…it’s hard to believe how the time is flying. Matt has been away from home for 4 weeks now! I’m surprised how well we are doing being apart…even though we both have our moments, neither one of us dwell on it. We just believe in making the most of the time we do have together and checking in with each other every day. So far, so good. Even Matt would say that. As hard as it is to be apart, we are both hanging in there. Our love is strong. Our bond, unbreakable. I thank God for that everyday.
Matt had another good week. He is still working hard everyday and the changes are starting to show to me. Matt is still unsatisfied…he’s so stubborn, he often poo-poos the progress. He says he won’t feel good about things until he’s able to do it all! I guess there’s nothing wrong with having a goal and working so hard to get there! It’s easy to want to stay motivated, but to actually do it day in and day out…well, that’s a whole different ballgame.
This weekend I brought him a VCR, some of his favorite movies, and some of our home movies to watch and show. We watched his famous ‘Big Stupid Fun’ video. It’s a video montage of Matt and a few friends drag racing at Eddyville, as well as doing smoky burnouts down at nearby boat ramp. It was fun to watch, and also bittersweet. It was strange to see Matt walking around on video, laughing and talking. I know everyone misses that old Matt. But I take heart in seeing pieces of him returning. Every now and then he’ll say or do something that is so VERY Matt and I’ll laugh. He’ll look at me and say ‘See, that’s the old me’…or ‘Yep, that’s ME’. It’s amazing how much we take for granted. The simple things…it’s hard to really break them down and realize how fortunate we are to be able to do them. I hope everyone is able to take a step back now and then and give thanks.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

WE'RE ADOPTING!!

Bah! I said it…er wrote it…out loud. There it is, in black and white for the world to see. (Pause for a drink and a breath) Matt and I are in the very early stages of planning to adopt. We have had a few meetings with an adoption agency, we are gathering the necessary information, and we are making plans to get this ball officially rolling SOON. It has been a very long and winding road to get us to this point, and honestly I never thought we’d get here. Adoption isn’t what we started out hoping for. It isn’t where we thought we’d end up. But here we are – gearing up for what will surely be a life-changing experience for us with hearts full of hope and excitement. The topic of adoption has come up in the past, but we quickly dismissed it for one reason or another. Matt and I have had our fair share of insecurities about whether or not adoption would be a good option for us. Who would look at our family profile and pick us?? It was a burning question that we probably still have ...

I may as well tell you...

I had a miscarriage. I’ve debated for weeks whether or not to acknowledge it publicly. It’s such a personal thing…and this is such a public medium. But a few months have gone by and I’m no closer to feeling ok about it and truly nothing else on my mind really compares, so here I am, letting the world in on my secret. Over the past few weeks I’ve found very little comfort in the fact that only a small handful of people know about the miscarriage. It became nearly unbearable this week, during all our wonderful family Christmas celebrations. Being surrounded by so many people who love me and support me and have no idea how my heart has been broken – it’s a lonely place to be. Not that I would want them all to bombard me with pity or questions or sad looks in their eyes – I realize I can’t have it both ways. But a little acknowledgement goes a long way and I simply can’t ignore or deny the fact that something major happened in my life and impacted me, impacts me still.   It was a ...

A Glimpse Into Open Adoption

If you had been a customer of the Longhorn Steakhouse on Highway 19 in Palm Harbor, FL last Sunday night, you may have seen two couples walking through the restaurant, oogling a sweet baby boy on the way to their table. You may have commented on how cute he was. You may have thought he looked a lot like the woman carrying him. You may have wondered about the man in the wheelchair. But you likely would not have assumed you’d be witnessing this baby’s biological parents sit down to dine with his adoptive parents. It’s a scene I’ve been playing over and over in my mind as I recount the wonderful experiences of our trip to Florida. The magnitude of that moment, that evening, will never be lost on me. It was incredible to be a part of – and I’m so very grateful we had it. We had met up with Ethan’s birthmother, L, earlier in the day. She hadn’t seen him since he was a few hours old and was anxiously waiting for us outside a local mall. As soon as we saw each other the tears welled up in o...