Skip to main content

A SPRING in My Step

So it’s no small coincidence that today there seems to be a sizable spring in my step and width to my smile. It is bright and sunny outside, the breeze is noticeably warming, and our trip to paradise (i.e.Hawaii) is just around the corner. Ahh…what could I find to possibly complain about today?

The past few weeks have been busy with this and that, but with each passing week of gloomy, gray, dirty last-few-weeks-of-winterness, I found myself moving about at a very sluggish and mopey pace. I was sooo tired of winter; so tired of bundling up each morning, so tired of random snow showers, so tired of staring angrily at the stubborn pile of snow in the cul-de-sac behind us…willing it to shrink away and finally reveal the sidewalk below it. It seemed spring would never come…our dear friend Phil had fooled us yet again…dirty rodent. I was grumbly, impatient, IRRITATED!!!! How much longer? HOW MUCH LONGER!?!?!? And then finally…I believe we have turned the corner.

I see buds on trees…I see robins scurrying about. I hear motorcycles and kids playing outside. I think…!!! Of course it helps also that in every spare moment Matt and I are dreaming, researching, planning, or discussing plans for our trip. We are both so excited we can barely contain ourselves…this dream we’ve had for so long is about to come true…it hardly seems real. I close my eyes and I picture us on the beach…swimming in the ocean…laughing and smiling at all the beauty around us. I think of the freedom he is going to experience floating around in the water…of how pruned my hands are bound to be from endless hours of swimming. I think of the sounds the waves must make on the shore, and the beautiful sunsets we’ll see each evening. I think of all these things and the smile creeps back onto my face, unknowingly.

I found myself focused so intently on Hawaii dreaming during yoga class today – I’m sure the instructor wondered what I was sooo happy about as we moved from strenuous pose to challenging stretch. But the music she played took me to the Hawaii of my dreams and I couldn’t help but think that soon…SOON we will be there. I know that my dreams will pale in comparison to the real thing. I know that once my body has experienced swimming in the ocean, I’ll never want to get out. I know that once we visit Hawaii, it will be a part of us forever…and oh, I just can’t WAIT!!!!


Popular posts from this blog

I Was Born in a Small Town

So we’ve decided to move. We love Ankeny, our house, and our neighborhood so it’s a little bittersweet to think about moving, but ever since Ethan came along - oh how things have changed. When we set out to build a wheelchair friendly house for Matt nearly 9 years ago, we were mainly focused on the functionality inside the house. While of course we wanted the ease and function of zero grade entry, we also yearned for the freedom he would know in a house with wider doorways and room to maneuver the bulky chair. In our old house there were literally rooms he never went into, simply because he couldn’t get through. Our Ankeny home was a dream come true in so many ways. And it was lovingly planned out and put together by so many incredibly generous and thoughtful people. We were humbled time and time again with how things came together for us in that house. I’ll never forget coming home for the first time with Matt after our long, exhausting trip back from China. It was late, we were jet …

Where We're at…Right Now

This whole adoption thing is tough stuff, friends. It is a roller coaster ride like no other. And I have to be honest – I’m still not sure this will be it for us. I want to believe it is…but I’m just.not.sure. Matt and I were on our way to church yesterday, listening to the 90’s station when the cult classic ‘Achy Breaky Heart’ came on. We both giggled…and may have turned it up a tad. Near the end we both howled out a woooo-woooo in near perfect, spontaneous, unison with dear mullet headed Billy Ray. It made me laugh instantly and I blurted out ‘we’re so perfect together’. And honestly – we are.
That thought stuck with me all morning.  We.are.perfect.together.  What we have – our marriage, our friendship, our devotion and commitment to each other….they are priceless. Our union is a blessing. It is blessed. 100% meant to be. No doubt in my mind. There is no one on this planet who could ever know me like Matt. We have been through hell and back together. In the hospital, shortly after his …

Mother's Day Emotions

Mother’s Day weekend is coming and I’m finding myself all sorts of emotional – go figure. I think the anticipation of how I might feel on my very first Mother’s Day after so many years of hoping, waiting, and wondering sort of made it a bit anticlimactic. Or maybe I guarded my heart a little and didn’t fully let the magnitude of my emotions wash over me. Regardless, I find myself MUCH more emotional this time around.
Last night we watched a TV show about children growing up and moving out etc…and I actually cried. All those jerks who told me how fast children grow and how quickly the time moves…were right. Of course I feel how swiftly time moves the older I get…I blinked and now I’m in my (gulp) 40’s. But I simply could not have fathomed how I would feel about the amount of time I have to be Ethan’s mother. It feels finite. Fleeting. Just not enough.
Don’t get me wrong, I love watching Ethan grow! He is learning and changing and cracking me up all the time. He loves climbing, and runn…