Skip to main content

Wednesday Update:9/21/05

Well, it’s late on Wednesday evening. The crowd of visitors and family has dwindled back down to my mom and Matt’s sister Lissa. We are still in the CCU…but that is only a technicality. The neurology floor is apparently a very busy one and we are waiting for a bed to become available to move him into. We hope it will be tomorrow. In the mean time we are happy with his care here in the unit. Most of the nurses (well, all but one big B named Katie) have been very attentive and helpful. I am learning however, that not all nurses go into this field because they are called to help others with their compassion, as well as their skills. I think they should do some kind of sensitivity training in nursing programs. Maybe they do…and Miss Katie BS’d her way through. ANYWAY…we are still very happy that Matt is continuing to improve.

They performed another CT scan today and the swelling has gone down again! YAHOO! Matt has had his eyes open a lot more today, but was complaining of double vision. Trouble with the eyes is not uncommon with this type of injury. I am told that his vision will probably take the longest to get back to normal. Apparently the eyes are seeing ok, and his vision is the same as before, but they are not working together very well yet. We got a patch today and will begin working on having him look through one eye at a time. This is pretty frustrating to him right now, but I’m hoping he’ll adjust as time goes on and as his comprehension of what is going on around him increases.
It’s hard to believe that it was merely one week ago that this great shift in our lives occurred. It seems like an eternity since that day. I miss my house, my dogs, my bed…and my Matty Matt most of all. I look at him lying there and I know it’s him…and yet he seems somewhat unfamiliar to me. Where is my big strong husband…my best friend, my soul? I find myself wanting to shake him and tell him to wake up and come back to me. It is so incredibly frustrating…and it’s only been a week. I pray for the strength to endure the weeks ahead of us. It is only through God’s grace that I can pull it together day after day. The doctor says that when we’re all sitting around the fireplace on Valentine’s Day we’re going to just look at each other and say ‘Phew…how did we survive that!?’ I can’t wait for that day.

They are planning to try and do an MRI tomorrow. If they can’t get him to lay still long enough, they’ll just plan to do it another time. The neurosurgeon wants to be sure there are no more malformed vessels in his brain, which could cause potential problems down the road. It is my hope that there will be nothing there to find. Please pray that everything else is normal!

We saw a doctor from Younker’s Rehabilitation today as well. He is very optimistic that because of Matt’s age and health, he will make a full recovery. I am filled with such optimism each time a doctor says that. I trust them not to give me false hope. I know that Dr. Struck (the neurologist) certainly doesn’t mince words…so I’m banking on her experience and knowledge and hoping that they will be right. They are thinking he could be ready to begin rehabilitation therapies as early as next week. I’m just so happy to be ending the critical part of this journey, and beginning the healing phase. Your thoughts and prayers are keeping us going…and I know that God is hearing us. I cannot thank you enough.


Popular posts from this blog

Where We're at…Right Now

This whole adoption thing is tough stuff, friends. It is a roller coaster ride like no other. And I have to be honest – I’m still not sure this will be it for us. I want to believe it is…but I’m just.not.sure. Matt and I were on our way to church yesterday, listening to the 90’s station when the cult classic ‘Achy Breaky Heart’ came on. We both giggled…and may have turned it up a tad. Near the end we both howled out a woooo-woooo in near perfect, spontaneous, unison with dear mullet headed Billy Ray. It made me laugh instantly and I blurted out ‘we’re so perfect together’. And honestly – we are.
That thought stuck with me all morning.  We.are.perfect.together.  What we have – our marriage, our friendship, our devotion and commitment to each other….they are priceless. Our union is a blessing. It is blessed. 100% meant to be. No doubt in my mind. There is no one on this planet who could ever know me like Matt. We have been through hell and back together. In the hospital, shortly after his …

I may as well tell you...

I had a miscarriage. I’ve debated for weeks whether or not to acknowledge it publicly. It’s such a personal thing…and this is such a public medium. But a few months have gone by and I’m no closer to feeling ok about it and truly nothing else on my mind really compares, so here I am, letting the world in on my secret. Over the past few weeks I’ve found very little comfort in the fact that only a small handful of people know about the miscarriage. It became nearly unbearable this week, during all our wonderful family Christmas celebrations. Being surrounded by so many people who love me and support me and have no idea how my heart has been broken – it’s a lonely place to be. Not that I would want them all to bombard me with pity or questions or sad looks in their eyes – I realize I can’t have it both ways. But a little acknowledgement goes a long way and I simply can’t ignore or deny the fact that something major happened in my life and impacted me, impacts me still.
It was a warm, sunn…

Mother's Day Emotions

Mother’s Day weekend is coming and I’m finding myself all sorts of emotional – go figure. I think the anticipation of how I might feel on my very first Mother’s Day after so many years of hoping, waiting, and wondering sort of made it a bit anticlimactic. Or maybe I guarded my heart a little and didn’t fully let the magnitude of my emotions wash over me. Regardless, I find myself MUCH more emotional this time around.
Last night we watched a TV show about children growing up and moving out etc…and I actually cried. All those jerks who told me how fast children grow and how quickly the time moves…were right. Of course I feel how swiftly time moves the older I get…I blinked and now I’m in my (gulp) 40’s. But I simply could not have fathomed how I would feel about the amount of time I have to be Ethan’s mother. It feels finite. Fleeting. Just not enough.
Don’t get me wrong, I love watching Ethan grow! He is learning and changing and cracking me up all the time. He loves climbing, and runn…