Karwoski Life

So I assume you have all heard the song Shut-Up and Dance by Walk the Moon. And hopefully, you’ve all seen these awesome movie montage videos set to the song – as they are HIGHLY entertaining… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVJu9AMJJr4&list=RDkVJu9AMJJr4 On a recent road trip, we discovered how much we both (yes, I said BOTH) love this song. It’s catchy. It’s upbeat. It’s fun to sing. It’s just a super fun song. I was tickled and surprised that my oh-so-stuck-in-the-80’s/90’s husband would dare to listen to and enjoy such a ‘modern’ song. We heard it repeatedly on the trip and each time, we’d turn it up and yell sing. Well, at least I would sing – Matt just smiled and tried to enjoy the song despite it. Last week, my parents drove a load of stuff up from Oklahoma in preparation for their upcoming move back to Iowa. It was a weird weather day – with rain off and on. While we were outside preparing to unload their tractor, it started to pour.  So we all ran for our cars ...

We’re staying the course. Matt and I have spent a lot of time over the past few weeks thinking, praying, and talking about what our next steps could or should be in this crazy quest to become parents. While neither of us feel a resounding YES this is the plan for us, neither of us really feel ready to walk away just yet either. And maybe that is the reassurance we were looking for. So, we will be meeting next week with our social worker to update our home study paperwork and will continue down this path a while longer. As if to confirm God is telling us to hang in there, we’ve received two more potential situations yet this week…and a call from a fellow adoption friend who may have a connection to several other potential situations for us to consider. Throw all that activity in with a crazy work schedule, grass that needs mowed, hair that needs trimmed, floors that need cleaned, a silly race that needs to be run, and Miss Emily has been feeling fraZZLED! I think it would be just lik...

This whole adoption thing is tough stuff, friends. It is a roller coaster ride like no other.  And I have to be honest – I’m still not sure this will be it for us. I want to believe it is…but I’m just.not.sure. Matt and I were on our way to church yesterday, listening to the 90’s station when the cult classic ‘Achy Breaky Heart’ came on. We both giggled…and may have turned it up a tad. Near the end we both howled out a woooo-woooo in near perfect, spontaneous, unison with dear mullet headed Billy Ray. It made me laugh instantly and I blurted out ‘we’re so perfect together’. And honestly – we are. That thought stuck with me all morning.  We.are.perfect.together.  What we have – our marriage, our friendship, our devotion and commitment to each other….they are priceless. Our union is a blessing. It is blessed. 100% meant to be. No doubt in my mind. There is no one on this planet who could ever know me like Matt. We have been through hell and back together. In the h...

Those who know me, know that math is not my strong suit, not my passion, not even my mildest interest. I really stink at math and pretty much enjoy avoiding it as much as possible in my daily life – much to the chagrin of those with stronger math brains than mine. (My beloved tip cheat sheet always makes me smile and makes Matt roll his eyes.) Just the other day I was playing in a ping pong tourney at work and joked at how hard counting is – particularly when switching sides with your partner and keeping track of whose serve it is etc…doubles ping pong is HARD! (What department do you work in, they asked me?) Recently I found myself doing some math, surrounding our journey to start a family. Specifically around Phase II of our journey – Phase I was soooo long ago and that sort of math does nothing but frustrate me on all sorts of levels so I try not to go there…much. But, just looking at Phase II, the math is also frustrating. I realized…it’s been 3 YEARS since we decided we wanted ...

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about this crazy dream of ours to have a family. (Weird, I know.) Last week, we talked a lot about things, after our first (and now second) official nos. I was feeling defeated…frustrated…and wondered if I was pushing for something that just wasn’t meant to be. Recently we had a little t-shirt fundraiser for our adoption…and raised over $550! We had loving support from friends and family that was completely unexpected - it meant SO much to us. The t-shirt design says ‘Dare the Impossible’…which can be interpreted in any number of ways; to dare to reach for what seems impossible, to dare believe that the impossible IS possible, to trust that daring is worth doing.  For us – for me - the significance of this shirt means all the more to me now.  I have to admit - I feel like I’ve been half in with this whole adoption thing. I found myself praying for God to work out the details and trying to trust Him, but guarding my heart at the same time ...

We had our first ‘official’ no this week. It’s a strange feeling – knowing that someone is looking at our profile information, reading our words, pouring over our pictures, analyzing the details and trying to decide if they think WE could parent their unborn child. While we may have been presented to several birth families through our initial agency, we were never told about it. They like to prevent the heartache of knowing you’ve received a ‘no’ and only contact you if you’ve got a birth family seriously looking to choose you. It has its pros and cons. Signing up with the adoption consultant, I knew we’d have more involvement in the process. We are actually provided details of situations and decide IF we want to be presented. Then we actually know they are looking. I was looking forward to this ‘knowing’. But last week, as we waited, wondering, praying, hoping that they see some sort of connection and decide we are the ones I was torn about how I felt about the ‘knowing’. All...

Last weekend Matt and I were able to spend the long holiday weekend with my parents in Oklahoma. We enjoyed long, lazy days watching football, dining on wonderful homemade food, shopping around town, putting up Christmas decorations and just spending quality time together. Thanksgiving at Mom and Dad's has become a family tradition over the past few years and one that I treasure. I simply love everything about the weekend; putting on aprons and helping Mom in the kitchen, setting a pretty table, watching Dad carve the turkey, helping Mom decorate her Christmas tree, and helping Dad put up Christmas lights, watching football, football, football, eating leftovers, and exploring the Atwoods store for goodies. No matter how old I get - it's like I'm a kid again! This year, two of my dearest friends' fathers have struggled with life altering and debilitating illnesses. My heart aches for them as they watch their fathers weaken and watch their mothers take on new roles...